


case of joe spooky

by and_hera



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe- No Supernatural, Buzzfeed Unsolved Supernatural, Comedy, Gen, but actually there's a little supernatural just not like canon levels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-11
Updated: 2020-09-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:08:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26400901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/and_hera/pseuds/and_hera
Summary: “Case of Joe Spooky,” Tim says slyly, opening a case file that definitely is not about Joe Spooky, “regarding sinister happenings in downtown old-”“Tim, get the hell out of my chair!”or, a Buzzfeed Unsolved AU.
Relationships: Georgie Barker/Melanie King, Martin Blackwood/Jonathan Sims, Sasha James & Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist & Tim Stoker, Sasha James/Tim Stoker
Comments: 12
Kudos: 202





	case of joe spooky

**Author's Note:**

> this is super silly! it's been in the works for a bit and i just finally finished it, so i hope you all enjoy! the main three characters are tim, sasha, and jon, but everyone else is there too!  
> jsyk i have no clue how bfu works! this fic is not affiliated with them in any way and it is not an accurate portrayal of how their videos are made i assume!  
> leave comments and kudos! talk to me on twitter @lcvelaces! hope u enjoy <3

“This week on Buzzfeed Unsolved, we’re looking into the case of Graham Folger, and his supposed… disappearance?”

“The way you say that worries me, Sasha.”

“Well,” Sasha says, “I suppose you’re going to have to listen to the case to figure out what I mean.”

Jon gives her a Look, one that means _if you’re going to say “disappearance” in that tone you better have something good_ and Sasha shoots him one back that means _shut the fuck up Jonathan and let me do my goddamned job_. To the viewers, it’s a classic Jon-Sasha face-off, something rather frequent in their show, but Tim knows better. It’s a whole conversation.

“Fine,” Jon huffs, and he instinctively grabs a cup of tea and takes a drink before furrowing his brows and looking at it, confused. “I- I didn’t grab a cup of tea before we started.”

“You sure you didn’t just grab one and forget about it? You have it so often to take dramatic sips and look at the camera it’s probably muscle memory, you’re literally a classic British person,” Sasha teases, a smile playing at her lips.

Jon’s eyes widen, marginally. “Martin,” he says, his voice low. He takes another drink of the tea.

Sasha raises an eyebrow. “Martin?”

Jon heaves a sigh. “Martin Blackwood, he- he works with the team, picking cases and such. He- well, he pissed me off last week, and now he keeps trying to bribe me into liking him by bringing me tea.”

“Oh?” Sasha looks directly into the camera, smiling ever so slightly, and Tim winks at her.

“Oh,” Jon agrees. He opens his mouth, closes it. “It’s good tea, though,” he says quietly. 

Sasha breaks, turning to the side and covering her mouth as she laughs. “Christ,” she says, “whatever did the poor man do to make you like- this?”

Jon rolls his eyes. “I’ll tell you later,” he says. “Don’t we have a case?”

Sasha laughs, opening the file. “I suppose we do,” she says, and she begins to narrate the truly creepy story of poor Graham apparently being replaced by someone else.

Tim watches Jon, though, and he thinks he would very much like to meet this Martin Blackwood.

* * *

Timothy Stoker likes his job, for the most part.

Yeah, okay, the head of their department is the shittiest fucking human being on the planet, but the community is very nice despite Elias’s best efforts. Sasha is, of course, probably the love of Tim’s life, which is a bonus. He loves getting to see her work every day.

There is, of course, Jonathan Sims to deal with, but it isn’t like Tim isn’t used to him. Before Sasha was even a part of Buzzfeed, before Unsolved existed and while Tim was just a cameraman and Jon just an assistant director, Tim had kissed him (a very bad idea in retrospect, of course, but you know what they say about hindsight) during a crew party. Jon was standing to the side, and he was quite attractive, and Tim was still new and thinking about Danny, and he thought a make out session between vague acquaintances might help.

It did not, surprisingly, help. Jon was firmly _not_ interested in Tim (which was a mistake on his part, of course, because Tim is a _catch_ ) and told him off for it, and God he does not mince words.

Tim does like him, though, in a _this angry scrawny man who forgets to brush his hair is now my friend_ type of way.

But, yeah. Buzzfeed Unsolved is a good team, and considering it’s still rather new, fans _love_ it. Sasha has no self control, so everyone knows she’s taken by a mysterious fellow named Tim. Jon, though- Jon doesn’t talk about others, that much.

Tim wants to meet this Martin very, very much.

* * *

Sasha tilts her head knowingly. “You never know,” she says. “Ghosts can be kinky.”

Jon looks at the camera.

“They can be!”

Jon does not look at her.

“Oh, come on, Jonathan,” and she grabs his face and turns it to hers. “Coward. Accept the truth.”

Jon swats her hand away, and he cracks a smile for once. “What are you saying,” he says, “that when you see a ghost with chains around its wrists, it is not, in fact, experiencing eternal torture, but-”

“Well, I suppose you could still call it eternal torture,” Sasha replies. Jon groans. “You get it. Ghost kinks.”

“Okay, don’t call it that, that just makes it sound like a living human being wants to fu-”

“Noted, we’ll call them kinky ghosts. Anyway.”

“How is this a still running show?”

“It won’t be, if you two keep talking about the sexual habits of ghosts,” Melanie calls from the other camera, and Tim snickers. 

Sasha waves a hand, dismissing her. “Elias doesn’t give a shit,” she says. “I do what I want.”

“And that line is never going to see the light of day,” Jon says pointedly, rolling his eyes at Sasha, “unless we want to lose our jobs.”

* * *

“You see this fucked up book?” Sasha says, smiling far too much for the subject matter at hand. 

Jon eyes the thing. “Very… fucked up,” he says.

“Yes. Fucked up. We’re gonna read it.”

“Christ. I hate my job.”

* * *

“Listen,” Jon says, voice loud and arrogant (as it so often is), and makes some annoyed gesture with his hands. “It’s not too out of the ordinary to use tape recorders.

“Okay,” Sasha retaliates, pulling her hair out of her face with a rubber band as she does, “fine. Tape recorders _aren’t_ strange and old-timey and are just, I don’t know, fun to look at. Good?”

Jon splutters (as he so often does) and continues: “Sasha, I’m not arguing that they aren’t _old-timey_ , and sure, in the right circumstances they can be plenty strange, but I don’t think saying that someone should be a-a- accused of _murder_ because they have a tape recorder in their house!”

Exasperated: “Jon, the only evidence found at the crime scene was a tape! Sure, there only thing on the tape was dead air and some scratching, but-”

Annoyed: “Sasha, there are so many people in the world who own tape recorders, what are you on about-”

Decided: “Not with direct connections to the murder- murderee? Shit, what’s the word-”

Tired: “The murdered? Are you talking about the dead person, Sasha?”

Sasha laughs, shaking her head at Jon, who sits next to her with a raised eyebrow. “That’s the fucker! But you get my point, do you not?”

Jon sighs, as he is so prone to do. “Yes,” he says, “fine. I get it. I still think you shouldn’t insult tape recorders as you were-”

“What? Do you use tape recorders, Jonathan? Do you confess your deepest, darkest secrets out loud to some old, shitty machine?”

Jon- well. Jon doesn’t answer, and Tim almost laughs out loud. Of _course_ that idiot uses tape recorders. Probably for the aesthetic, too. God.

Sasha is _overjoyed_. “Tim,” she says, horribly involving him in the situation, “babe. Honey. Love of mine. Are you hearing this?”

Tim gestures helplessly, barely not laughing out loud. Jon looks like he wants to die.

“Tim,” Jon says, continuing to break the- well. Shit, it’s not like their producers care when they break the fourth wall. Elias doesn’t bother to go over their episodes, and Tim certainly won’t talk to him and ask permission. He gestures for Melanie to aim her camera at him, so later they can include him later. “Tim, Sasha is just being a horrible person, I do _not_ -”

“Listen,” Tim says, definitely grinning, “it’s none of my business, Jon. I’m just curious as to what secrets you’re telling those dear tape recorders. I’ve noticed that you’ve had quite a few cups of tea just over the last few days, and-”

Jon stands up, slowly, and pushes his chair in as he walks out of the room. He takes the cup of tea with him.

Sasha is absolutely losing it, doubled over and wheezing. “Jon,” she calls after him, “Jonathan, do you have a _crush_? And instead of talking to him-” she tries to catch her breath- “you confess to a _fucking tape recorder_?”

Jon spins around, points a finger at Sasha. “I did not make fun of you while you pined over Tim,” he declares.

“Yeah, because I had the balls to ask him out after a week of thinking about it, you absolute shithead,” she says, delighted. “C’mon, Jon, I’m your best friend. Your only friend,” she says to herself.

“I heard that.”

“Course you did. Now, sit down. We still have a case, you see-”

Jon raises a brow. “Do we really, though? Because I thought it was Buzzfeed _Un_ solved, and apparently it’s a pretty cut and dry case with the tape recorders and all-”

“Oh, fuck off,” Sasha laughs. “We won’t keep the bits about poor Mr. Blackwood, Jon, let’s finish this.”

“I don’t know who you’re talking about,” Jon says, blandly. “I don’t know a- Mr. Blackwood? Never met him.” He sighs, deeply. He looks in his cup and drinks the rest of it before returning to his seat.

“Okay,” Sasha says, putting on her narrator voice. “This brings us to theory number two: alien abduction.”

Jon slams his head on the table instantly, and Sasha loses it all over again.

* * *

The Buzzfeed Unsolved team is good.

It started out with one camera (Timothy Stoker himself) with Jon and Sasha sitting at a desk and just going absolutely ham over conspiracy theories. Tim had just lost his little brother to something he didn’t quite understand (not like he would talk to anyone about it) and was curious enough about unsolved cases to volunteer to film the small and unlikely to succeed new idea. 

Now, they have three cameras (Tim on main, Melanie on Jon, Daisy on Sasha) and a desk full of knick knacks and a board complete with red string and tacks on the wall behind them. 

(At first glance, this wall would appear to be for decoration. But, in an unspoken agreement, Jon and Sasha spend a few minutes at the end of every episode attaching something from that case to the wall. Tim used to think it was just a little act to remember the case. But when they put actual thread connecting cases and make note of details in cases that have appeared in others, Tim thinks something more might be going on. He doesn’t mention it.)

And they have the team of people getting information, their self-named “braincell group.” Basira Hussain is the leader, and frankly she scares Tim a little with her no-nonsense behavior. It’s why he wonders how she lets her new assistant Martin Blackwood get away with whatever he has been doing with Jonathan Sims.

Jon and Sasha, the one factor that has remained the same throughout all of the seasons, all of the episodes. Their love of conspiracy theories led them to try and make their own section of Buzzfeed, and somehow the world loved their dynamic enough to make it one of the most popular parts of the network. Jon with his cynicism and snark despite being more likely to believe in the supernatural than anyone else, Sasha with her energy and teasing despite being more level headed than most people Tim knows. It makes for fun times and lots of jokes, usually at Jon’s expense. 

(But the board, Tim reminds himself. Sometimes, regardless of how funny the cases may seem, Jon and Sasha mark them down. Put them on the ever growing board. Use red yarn to connect cases, muttering things like _another infestation of insects- it’s like people are being corrupted, or something_ or _another person replaced with someone else, is it the same thing?_ It’s odd.)

(If Tim didn’t know better, he would think Jon and Sasha were keeping secrets. If Tim didn’t know better.)

* * *

“Case of Joe Spooky,” Tim says slyly, opening a case file that definitely is not about Joe Spooky, “regarding _sinister_ happenings in downtown old-”

“Tim, get the hell out of my chair!”

* * *

“Hey. Hey, Jon.”

“What, Sasha.”

“Guess what this episode is about.”

“Probably an unsolved case. Supernatural, since we are in the middle of a supernatural season.”

“Okay, yeah. But. Guess what it’s about.”

A sigh. “What, Sasha?”

“ _Spiders_.”

“Why are you like this.”

Sasha laughs, loud and clear. She meets Tim’s eyes. “Did you get that,” she asks, still grinning, and he nods. It will make a good opening. 

“Sasha,” Jon says, drawing out the syllables. “You know I hate these. Please do not.”

“Jon,” Sasha says, drawing out the syllables. “It was in the email! Did you not check?”

“I didn’t think I needed to check- fine. Let’s just get it over with.”

Sasha meets Tim’s eyes behind the camera and flips her folder open with a flourish. “On this week's episode, we cover the story of Carlos Vittery, his arachnophobia, and his subsequent death.”

“These things correlate, then?”

Sasha smiles. “Oh, yes.”

Jon sighs, heavily, and goes to pick up a cup of tea that usually sits to his right and pauses, realizing there is nothing there to pick up. He makes a _hm_ noise, not quite loud enough to be heard clearly by his mic but loud enough that Sasha raises a brow. “What’s happening with our dear Mr. Blackwood?” she asks lightly, and Jon gives her a Look. Another classic staredown that means _not with cameras rolling, I don’t want to get into this, Sasha_ and _you know we can cut what we want tell me about the cute boy, Jon_.

Tim waves, getting Sasha’s attention, and points to the cameras, trying to get across that he can shut them off if she wants. She shakes her head, giving him a thumbs up. “Jon,” she says, “we’re talking later. You can’t escape it. Now. Episode time?”

“Yes, yes, of course,” Jon says. “Arachnophobia? My _favorite_.”

Sasha grins. 

* * *

“And- well. They found his body a few weeks after the diary is dated. He- he was covered in webs.”

“Jesus Christ.”

“Yeah.”

Jon shudders. “So, we have a huge immortal spider and a- a murder? That seems to have some from said spider. You don’t think-”

“It’s a weird case all around,” Sasha says, voice light as she cuts him off. “I do have some theories, but there isn’t much to say about them? Like, maybe some weird murderer tied him up in copious amounts of web, somehow? But really, we both know what everyone thinks the answer is-”

“The immortal spider killed poor Carlos and webbed him up, yes,” Jon says, voice heavy as he cuts her off. “ _Hm_.”

“Okay, listen up,” Melanie says from behind her camera, and Tim looks at her like she’s insane, because they are _filming_? “You two have been acting super weird this whole episode. What the fuck is going on, and what does it have to do with that board behind you?”

Jon freezes. Sasha blinks.

Tim sighs, hitting a button on his camera to turn it off. “Seriously,” he says. “Usually you have several bits in by now, and you haven’t cracked a single joke. It’s weird. Is it because of Jon’s unnecessary fear of spiders, or-”

“Tim,” Sasha interjects, “to be fair, his fear of spiders is entirely necessary.” She sighs, and Tim gestures for Daisy to turn her camera off as well. Someone cuts the mics from the sound room, probably Rosie, since she’s a gem, and Tim gives a thumbs up to the general direction of the sound room.

“Elaborate,” Tim says, walking up to the desk instead of staying back. Daisy and Melanie follow.

Jon looks helplessly at Sasha, who rolls her eyes. “You all should probably know, anyway. Jon and I have been- well. You’ve clearly noticed the board. It’s something odd we’ve been noticing with all the cases lately.”

“Does this have to do with the _literal red string_ connecting the cases together?” Daisy asks, and Tim is honestly surprised; she’s normally quite reserved, but here she is, joining in.

Sasha sighs, deeply. “Yes. If you look at the cases we’ve been covering lately, it’s like, I don’t know, they fit into sections? We have a few different categories.”

“Spiders are one,” Jon says, “even though I _told_ Sasha I think the fuckers should fit with the other bugs, they don’t deserve their own-”

“Spiders are one,” Sasha interrupts, “and other types of swarming bugs are another. There’s cases about people being replaced, and I think that one’s connected to the circus, too-”

“Circus?” Tim asks, because Sasha is the only one who knows about Danny, and he isn’t entirely pleased with her knowing something and not telling him.

Sasha closes her eyes. “The cameras are off, right?”

“Yes.”

“Tim,” she says, “I won’t get into it, but I think there’s something to- to what you told me about. Your brother.”

Tim sighs. “Okay. I’ll bite. Tell me more.”

“Personally, I’m a bit worried that all of these supernatural cases are possibly true,” Melanie says. “Some of them are fuckin’ _weird_. Ghosts are one thing, but immortal spiders? _Clowns?_ ”

Jon shrugs. “Maybe? I mean, I think ghosts are real. They don’t like, completely fit in with what we have going, though, not in a cohesive way.”

“Jon, Sasha,” Daisy says, “can I get Basira? I think she should be here.”

“Ooh,” Sasha says, “yeah, that’s fine. Tell her to bring her _assistant-_ ”

“Do _not_ ,” Jon says.

“I absolutely will,” Daisy says. She doesn’t smile, because Daisy rarely smiles, but she winks at Jon as she leaves the room. 

Tim sighs. “We’re not going to get much shooting done today, are we? We got all the statement we need from Sasha, but no humor, and since this is, you know, a comedy show-”

“Yes, yes, we _know_ , Tim.” Jon drums his fingers on the table he and Sasha sit at. “But this takes precedence.”

“Tell that Elias,” Melanie says wryly.

Tim groans. “God, don’t say his name in here. This room is an Elias-free zone, agreed?”

Sasha smiles a little. “Please. If we weren’t so independent, I would quit rather than deal with him.”

* * *

They talk.

Martin is out sick, so sadly Jon doesn’t get to make a fool of himself around him, but Basira comes in and they talk about the great big spooky that seems to be fucking with the world. Yippee.

At one point, Melanie says, “you know, I bet Georgie would know a little something about this.” Jon looks at her with a mix of shock and confusion, and says “Georgie Barker?” Melanie says that they’re dating, and Jon looks like he’s going to cry. “We dated in college,” he says, which causes a whole five straight minutes of Jonathan Sims teasing time. 

Tim joins in, because clearly some fucked up nonsense is going on, so he’s allowed to make fun of his coworker for only liking people way too good for him.

There are categories of this spooky, and Jon and Sasha have them mostly figured out. About thirteen, give or take one. 

Tim’s job just got a whole lot harder, he thinks. Maybe he shouldn’t have joined the pointless-doomed-to-fail job in the first place.

But then Sasha smiles wryly at him, as if an apology and excitement and worry all in one expression, and he decides that maybe it’ll be worth it in the end.

* * *

Sasha’s sitting on a half wall outside the school building, grinning.

“This place is shit,” she says to Tim, who’s filming her. Maybe she’s just saying it to the camera. Whatever. “Was in there for ten minutes, all by my lonesome. I don’t care about whatever fucked up Christmas decorations scared those fifteen year olds. This place is _shit_.”

She looks down at her shoes and giggles. “I told Jon that the place gave me the creeps,” Sasha confesses. “Told him that when I was on the top floor, I heard a voice. Figured that since he’s so riled up by this place, might as well give him something to look forward to.”

As if on cue, there’s a shout heard from the building. Tim points his camera up to the window on the top floor. There’s a silhouette of a man holding a camera of his own, a scrawny guy with shaggy hair. 

Remarkably clearly, you can hear him shouting “fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! And _especially_ fuck you! I am not afraid of ghosts!”

Tim points the camera back at Sasha, who is laughing hysterically. “I think he might be afraid of ghosts,” she whispers in between breaths. Jon can still be heard cursing violently from inside. “Oh my God, he’ll never hear the end of this.”

When Jon eventually makes it back outside, he tries to play it off, but Sasha starts laughing again the second she sees him. “What?” he asks indignantly.

“I just didn’t know how deep your fear of ghosts went,” she wheezes. “I would have never told you I heard voices upstairs if I knew I would have gotten _that_ reaction.”

“You could hear me?” Jon asks, a bit pointlessly. At this point, Tim’s glad he has his stand, because he’s shaking violently with the effort to not laugh out loud. “Well. I apologize.”

“Jonathan Sims, dear watchers,” Sasha says eventually, catching her breath.

Tim doesn’t know how much of it they’ll keep, but there’s a shot of Sasha laughing to the point of tears with Jon’s shadow moving back and forth in the window upstairs in the background that he knows is a keeper.

* * *

Eventually, Tim has had enough.

He sees Jon walk in with yet another cup of tea, staring at it like it contains all of the world’s secrets, and Tim walks right out the way Jon came and into the breakroom.

There’s a friendly looking man standing at the counter, pouring hot water from the kettle into a cup of his own. He looks up at Tim and almost dumps all the water onto his own hand in surprise.

“Oh, hello,” he says nicely, managing to collect himself. “You’re the cameraman, right?”

Tim smiles. “That’s me. Tim Stoker, at your service. And you’re Martin, right?”

Martin blinks. “Yeah,” he says. “I didn’t know people knew me?” He laughs nervously.

“Oh, I’ve only heard good things,” Tim says brightly. “Mostly about your tea making skills.”

“You don’t mean-” Martin pauses. “Has… has Jon mentioned my tea?” He sounds genuinely bewildered, and Tim is going to slam his head on the counter. They’re _both_ like this.

“You should come by sometime,” Tim says instead of doing that. “Visit the team. You seem lovely. I would _love_ to get to know you better.” Tim winks, and Martin flushes pink.

He stammers for a moment, before deciding on, “thanks!” and then pointedly going back to pouring his tea.

Tim knocks once on the doorframe before leaving.

“What was that about?” Jon asks when Tim walks back in.

Tim shrugs. “Don’t worry about it,” he says easily. Sasha grins at him, and he returns it.

* * *

“This week on Buzzfeed Unsolved, we dive into the case of Jane Prentiss,” Sasha says in her narrator voice. “Know anything about Jane Prentiss, Jon?” 

“Can’t say I do,” Jon replies. “Is this one good or is this one the kind that will make me want to die after hearing how stupid it is?”

Sasha shrugs innocently. “I found it interesting. If you don’t like the cases, Jon, you could always take it up with Basira. And her… _assistant_.”

Jon stares into the camera and takes a sip of his tea. Something that does nothing to disprove Sasha’s point, since the tea was made by their very own Martin Blackwood.

“Hey, guys?” Daisy says out of nowhere, and Tim and Melanie immediately go to shush her but then they remember it’s _Daisy_ and she barely talks unless she has something important to say. “Did you get this email from Elias?”

Sasha has her phone out in an instant, Jon not too long after.

“Big boss himself,” Tim mutters to himself, accidentally clicking on two spam emails before reaching the one Daisy is talking about. It’s dated ten minutes ago.

“What the fuck?” Jon says loudly. “We can’t _quit_? What’s that supposed to mean?”

The door swings open, and Martin is there? Tim knows he told him to stop by sometimes, but they should be recording right now. Martin would know better, right?

“Worms,” Martin says breathlessly. He looks like he’s been running.

“Worms?” Sasha asks.

“Worms!” Basira yells as she follows Martin inside, closing the door behind her.

“Worms?!” Melanie echoes, sounding increasingly panicked.

Tim looks out the window of their recording studio, and believe it or not, there’s something in the hallways. A lot of somethings. White and wriggly somethings.

“Worms,” he says darkly, because what else are you supposed to say in a situation like this.

* * *

“To recap,” Tim says, “we get an email from Elias saying we can’t quit.”

“Yup,” says Daisy.

“And then we are hit with a wave of evil worms.”

“Yeah,” says Basira.

“And now they’re mostly gone but some are still alive and just chilling in our studio.”

“Yes,” says Melanie. 

Tim puts a hand to his temple. “I am so tired of this job. Jon, Sasha, why must you two have discovered that this spooky shit is all real? What are we supposed to do now?”

Sasha looks him dead in the eyes. “Record an episode,” she says.

“Record an episode?!”

Daisy shrugs. “Could be fun,” she agrees. “Fucked up worms in the studio.”

“Don’t you think that’s not the best idea?” Melanie says, and Tim points at her. “I mean, Elias is already acting weird. And what will the public think if we go full conspiracy?”

“We have proof that there are weird worms in our studio,” Jon muses. “And we have multiple pictures saved of Elias’s email. Maybe it could be interesting.”

Tim sighs. “I guess,” he says. “And he said we can’t quit our jobs? Which means that he probably can’t fire us, either.”

Melanie tilts her head. “He can’t fire us, you say?” she says slowly. “If that's the case, I have some redecoration ideas. A lot of them.”

“Hey, I’m not stopping you,” Basira says, which means she’ll help out.

This might not be a great idea. Some of the worms didn’t quite get killed with the CO2, and Tim doesn’t trust any contracts that he signed with Elias anymore. 

“Martin,” he says, “you’ve been awfully quiet. What do you think?”

Martin looks up from where he’s been staring at his toes. He shrugs. “I’m fine with whatever,” he says.

“Martin,” Jon says, and everyone looks at them, because holy shit, they’re _talking_ to each other. “I’m curious as to what you think the best course of action is. Really.”

Martin flushes again. “Well, if it was up to me,” he says, “I would like. Set the place ablaze. I _hate_ worms.”

Tim laughs out loud. “You’ve got an inner arsonist in you, huh?” he asks incredulously. “What the hell. If Martin’s down to cause chaos, I guess I’m in, too.”

Sasha gets up from her chair and laces her arm through Tim’s. “You ready to make a new episode, then?” she asks.

* * *

“This week on Buzzfeed Unsolved,” Sasha says, “we look into the case of Buzzfeed Unsolved.” She grins. “As you can see, our studio is a little disheveled.”

“It’s a bit of a long story,” Jon agrees.

“And it fits _perfectly_ with our supernatural season,” Sasha says triumphantly.


End file.
